Friday, June 15, 2012

No Words

Thought I should pop in and let you all know that no, I did not fall off the face of the earth. It’s been a very busy week and I haven’t had much time to blog.

I spent Monday – Wednesday of this week visiting five different orphanages. And honestly yes, I have been busy since we arrived home Wednesday evening, but another reason is that I just don’t have the words to say.

I have no idea how to put what I saw into words. If I could sum it up in one word it would be


Now I had never been in a Chinese orphanage prior to Monday. I had an idea of what they were like, but it doesn’t really hit you until you experience it for yourself. Children lying in metal or wooden cribs. No mattresses, blankets, or toys. No one to pick them up and tell them how they are loved and cherished. No one to sing to them or rock them to sleep. They get their diaper changed once, maybe twice a day. They receive hardly any human interaction and rarely if ever go outside.

I’m still in shock of what I saw and haven’t even begun to start processing it. As I was walking among the rows of cribs, I didn’t even know what to pray.

What do you pray?

The group of children that hit me the most, were those that are unadoptable. These are kids who are not available for international adoption due to their special needs. What hope is there for them? What do you even pray for over them as they lie in their cribs waiting to die?

Yes, the whole situation makes me angry. Although I’m not sure who I’m angry at. The orphanages are doing the best they can with their limited finances, resources, and staff. I want to do something… but again, I don’t even know what. Where do you even start?

Through the pain and suffering and hurt I saw, I kept reminding myself how much God loves these kids.

He knows each of them by name,

the number of hairs on their lice infected heads,

and He loves them so much.

I know His heart is breaking just as mine is. He never intended for His children to live like this. He calls us in James 1:27 to “take care of the orphans and the widows in their distress".

He calls us to act. To do something.

But what??

(Pictures are from our travels, not of the orphanages)



  1. There really are no words...

    And the only words that can bring hope are HIS words. We must read His Word more and more and more and more and He will guide us in what to do for the least of these.

    This is where we are right now...reading and praying and reading and praying....

    I'm so grateful you are a voice for the fatherless!

  2. Laine said it perfectly.

    The ONLY words that can bring hope in this midst of such sorrow and heartache, such need and brokenness, are HIS words! Renewing our minds daily and refreshing in His Word. Praying w/out ceasing.

    I can only imagine the depths of what your heart must have felt in the midst of walking through those cribs in that orphanage. It really did put new meaning and understanding into 'breaking your heart for what breaks His' didn't it!? I can only imagine.

    Yes, we too are so grateful that you are a voice for the fatherless! Keep refreshing in His Word and seeking Him in all you do, and He will light the way.

    love and hugs,
    ~ Tanya


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