Another Chapter Closing

“Look at the nations and watch—
    and be utterly amazed.
For I am going to do something in your days
    that you would not believe,
    even if you were told."

I love this passage from Habakkuk 1:5. It has been a favorite of mine for years but this year it keeps showing up over and over again. When that happens, I know that the Lord is trying to tell me something.

I'm in the midst of another season of transition. My apartment is filled with boxes, the walls are blank, and it's beginning to feel less like home. In early December, after a lot of prayer, I accepted a job at an adoption agency in the Washington D.C. area. Since my lease wasn't up until the beginning of February, they have graciously allowed me to work remotely for them so that I could finish up things here in Tulsa, pack up, and finish out my lease. I am so excited for this opportunity at an agency I have always wanted to work for and in a city I have always loved. But with any new chapter beginning, another chapter has to close.

Reaching the decision to pack up my life here and move, was not an easy one. It was a week of wrestling back and forth with the Lord and a lot of tears. But once I made my decision to take the job, a peace that can only come from Him washed over me and even though I knew the upcoming months would not be easy, I knew it was the right decision.

For the past 6 months or so, I have had this strong pull to move closer to my family. As I get older, as I think about hopefully someday meeting that special someone, settle down, and raise a family, I want my parents and family near. I will still be 300 miles away from them, but it is a doable drive. Much more manageable than flying back and forth between Tulsa and Buffalo two or three times a year. I have missed out on so much because I've been so far away -- bridal showers, baby showers, graduations, retirement party's, weddings, and just seeing my siblings and watching my nephews and niece grow up. Family is important to me and I realized, I have one life to live and I want to live it closer to my family and be able to see them more often than I do now. I have lived 1,000 + miles from my family for almost 5 years now and quite honestly, I'm just ready to be closer.

The absolute hardest thing about leaving Tulsa this week, is leaving my friends. I was so blessed to meet some of the most incredible people in the first two months I lived here. I have loved doing life with them. They inspire me to be a better person and a better friend. We have laughed and cried together and they have been more then just friends here these past two years, they have been my family. I know that we will keep in touch, I know that I will come back to visit, but I also know that it is going to look different since I won't see them each week. As scary as that is to walk away from "your people," I also know that that the Lord has placed amazing people into my life no matter where I have lived -- whether it's Jamestown, China, or Tulsa, and I know it won't be any different in Virginia. The Lord has already opened the doors for a wonderful living situation for me in Virginia and I already have friends there waiting for me.

I spent 3 weeks in Jamestown for Christmas and New Year's to process, recharge, and re-focus, and flew back to Tulsa on January 7th to start packing and finish up some things here. I knew that it was going to be a challenging few weeks, but it became even more challenging when a week and a half ago, I was in a car accident on the highway and totaled my car. Not exactly what I had planned when I was moving across the country in less than 2 weeks!

But God is faithful. I have seen His hand at work so much this past week and a half there is no doubt in my mind that He is at work. From walking away from the accident without a scratch or bruise on my body, to the amazing rescue crew He sent, to my insurance claim going through in just over a week, and my parents possible already finding me another car -- God has been at work. There is no other explanation.

As I sit here in my bedroom for the last lazy morning in my apartment, I can't help but feel the tears of sadness coming on as well as the bubble of excitement for all that lies ahead. Is it going to be hard? Absolutely. Are there are going to be moments where I will question if I am making a terrible mistake? Of course. But I know when I am following my heart and the direction I feel that the Lord is leading me in, I know that it is never, ever a mistake. I know without a doubt that He called me to Tulsa, it was just for a shorter amount of time than I thought. He showed up big time here and I know He'll show up big time in Virginia. 

I am finishing up packing today and my Dad will hit the road this afternoon to start the 1,100 mile trek from Jamestown to Tulsa. He'll arrive tomorrow, we'll pack up the uhaul, and start driving back to Jamestown Tuesday morning for a few days before heading to D.C. 

• Please pray for my Dad as he travels these next few days by himself. Being in a car is making me nervous these days anyways, but especially the thought of him driving that far by himself. 
• Please pray for me as I pack up my cute little apartment and begin saying "see you later's" to some of my favorite people.
• Please pray for my Dad and I as we drive across the country Tuesday and Wednesday. 
• Please pray for my transition to my new home and new job in Virginia next week.

The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”

Deuteronomy 31:8