Wednesday, February 3, 2010

It happened

It finally happened. After 2 weeks of living in China and working in the foster home, it has officially hit me what I'm doing and what these children are going through. I was sitting in the playroom at the end of the day with little Timothy whose 3 1/2 with spina bifida. He was probably the first child to really warm up to me when I got here. He was sick today and had a fever, and just sat with him with tears running down his little face. All I could think of was "this little boy needs a mom." I mean. I can love this little boy as much as I can but he needs his own mom to sit with him when he's sick and just love him. And here he was just sitting in the playroom crying. So he came over to me and just laid his head on my lap while I rubbed his head and sang to him. Oh my goodness... it just broke my heart. This poor little child who was abandoned at 1 day old and has gone into an orphanage and then into the foster home. Don't get me wrong, the kids in this foster home are loved so much. But each and everyone of these children needs their own family and that one on one attention that I can't give them. I try to as much as possible but it's hard. Then I just think of all the orphans not only all over China but all over the world. It was so hard for me to leave tonight. He was just crying as I left. I walked out and just started crying. I knew it would be hard and I'd become really attached to the kids but I didn't think it would happen this quickly. Sometimes it feels like how I can I as one person make a difference in this child's life? The're not even going to remember who I am? It's a lot to grasp all at once

1 comment:

  1. You are making a difference. You're teaching them to open their hearts to being loved.
    God Bless you!
    Jill :)

    ReplyDelete

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